Smorgasbord

Right, we all know I'm a crap blogger alright? It's not my fault that all my free time is spent fighting crime, sleeping and somehow getting chocolate on my neck, because with great power, comes great responsibility....

...so yeah, how are you and stuff? Really? Neat. Let's get down to the nitty-gritty; me what has been bought by the Hooligan for the last few months, neck chocolate aside that is.

TEES.

Above: 1 Seal tee, £15 - Lazy Oaf sale (January)

Below: 2 Popeye tee, Supreme, £35 - Dover Street Market (December)

Oh right, what a boob I am, turns out i don't have any photos of me in the other tees I blagged, and trust me there're some fucking beauts in there. But don't fret, I have a camera, and at least one friend with opposable thumbs so they'll be up soon. DON'T CRY BIRD.

So yeah, moving on...

1 How much of a beast is this please? Always got to show some love for Lazy Oaf, amazing designs on display on everything from tees to packing tape. This one was a no-brainer for me, let's run through the checklist;

* White tee? CHECK

* Fresh colouring? CHECK

* Ecstatic seal with tiny hands? CHECK

2 I don't need to tell you how hard Supreme is to get hold of. Seriously, it's a fucking joke at times, but then I'd rather it be that way than the average pleb bombing round town in a Supreme tee to match their G-Star Raw/Hollister combinations. Twats. But yeah, sourced this out way before release as I just full-on love everything about it, I mean come on, who doesn't love Popeye? The old drunk. It'll look even better when I lose my Christmas boobs though (yep, still here, damn neck chocolate...)

KICKS.

Above: 3 BAPE Roadsta88, £165 £99 - A Bathing Ape Pirate Store, London (January)

Below: 4 Nike + Stüssy, All-Court Black, £70 - The Hideout (December)

            5 Nike + Stüssy, All-Court White, £70 - The Hideout (December)

Above: 6 Nike AirMax Light, £90 - Foot Patrol (December

Below: 7 Nike AirMax 90 Infra-Red, £90 - Kixclusive (January)

The coming months are very strong in terms of sneaker releases, from the Nike Dunk Liberty and ?uestlove, to the upcoming new season in the Adidas/Star Wars range. However, before I get carried away I need to remember that I only have two feet and have to save up to go see Voodle in New York this summer (where I WILL finally snag the elusive Ueno Panda...)

3 BAPE opened up their first UK Pirate Store in Shoreditch from January 22-30th and offered rarities, factory seconds and limited quantities of fresh items at discounted prices. Naturally I was there on the sunday, met with a medium sized, but healthy queue outside the main doors, flanked by three huge guards decked in the finest Ape-wear. Inside was more of the same, with racks upon racks of goods surrounded by hype-bastards, clueless turds and general riff-raff. I copped a pair of red/gold Apesta88 (basically the Air Jordan 3 but for twice the price) discounted from £165 to £99. It was a no-brainer.

4 & 5 I previewed the Nike + Stüssy All-Courts back in October and impatiently awaited the drop. Learning my mistakes after the Nike Supreme 94 debacle I was all over tis release like a tramp on discarded chips. This time when I rang the Hideout, after exchanging pleasantries, I was hit with the million dollar question;

"Do you want to reserve a pair in white, in black, or do you want both?"

I shook, softly at first, but with each tremor my movement became more violent. Weighing up the pros and cons in my mind (Cons: Would barely afford to live for a month, christmas would be a struggle. Pros: I'd look hella bad-ass) I took the plunge and opted for both. Lucky I did though, as they sold out in a day, and considering that the Hideout was the only stockist of the kicks in the UK I was a very lucky boy indeed. I'll say this though, I didn't eat properly for the following weeks, but by God are my shoes beautiful.

6 Following on from my first AirMax gamble in August, I felt the time was right to get more. Well, that's a lie, I just happened to be in Foot Patrol with a fresh paycheck burning a hole in my pocket and had to buy them, mainly to fill the Infra-Red sized hole in my life...

7 ...which I plugged not long after. I wanted the Infra-Reds upon release back in August, but couldn't afford them due to moving down south, so when I finally got some pennies rolling I hunted the internet for a pair. As usual though, the only sizes available were in the region of size 5 (buy nice shoes you tiny footed pricks or I'll cut off your limbs). Luckily, New York dealer Kixclusive got some in to their web store, and the price, including postage, worked out roughly the same. Like all AirMax they're very comfy and seem to go with anything, despite the unorthodox colouring. Emma can't stand them though, but screw it, they're comfy and swish, and came in a stupidly fast amount of time.

So yeah, that's what I've been up-to for the last few months, aside from lucha-libre, Fanric, tee jaunts and music video making, but they're stories for another time....

...oh go on then. Here's a music video I made with my boys at Fungunt Productions for the Eurythmics' synth classic 'There Must Be An Angel (Playing With My Heart)'. Enjoy, and if you genuinely DO enjoy, then please let me, or the boys know through the above links *looks up two lines*

Tales of Interest!

Things have gotten a little slack here on BLHB, and I for one am not happy about it. Sure I can blame work, or the fact that all my free time has been spent either religously playing the latest Smackdown game or in the bank exasperated, but those would be the actions of a coward. Lucky then that I am a coward, so the answer is simple;

"My dog ate my computer."

* Recent Purchases

Money has started to flow into my bank account now so some inspired fashion purchases have been made, from the recent Nike Stüssy's (sold out in less than a day, I picked up two pairs), Nike Infra-reds and a pair of AirMax Lights, to one of Supreme's amazing Popeye tees, courtesy of DSM, bypassing a long awaited ensnaring of a 'look at me I go fox hunting/killing plebs for a gangster' Barbour jacket. It's safe to say then that I am loving my wardrobe at the moment as my collection of all things rare and exclusive is starting to blossom in this city that we call London.

*Noddy Holder-fest

Of course you don't need me to tell you that it's been Christmas recently, you've been constantly reminded by shops, television, radio and state sponsored propaganda films since mid June. This Christmas was a strange one for me peronally, as it was the first time I've been away form home in the build-up to the festive period and as such I was feeling a tad glum and bored. In true Steve Martin style though, I got home on Christmas eve (via train, not plane nor automobile unfortunately) and bounded straight to the pub dressed as a future sex offender to be greeted heroically and groped by a myriad of friends and relatives that I have not seen in months. Christmas itself, as ever, came and went extremely quickly and before I knew it I was back on my way to London bashing out my thoughts on my netbook. Ah well. The missus was up for a few days for the New year/January sales and my boys were up at the end of January for an ill-advised Fabric and shopping jaunt. As expected, several bass related injuries occurred.

*Odds and Sods

I'm obsessed with Nicolas Cage. I never thought it would happen seeing as I hated him as a child (despite never have seeing any of his movies until my teenage years). This recent worship was brought on by the incredible YouTube video of him losing his shit, which led to me shouting "VIVA LA FUCKING FRANCE MAN" at any opportunity, whether warranted or not.

Finally saw Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World and it is truly an awesome film. Combining the visceral talents of Edgar Wright, the subtle comic turnings of Michael Cera and enough American garage rock and dorky references to keep overweight fanboys like myself salivating, this film rocked my socks. Whilst being a comics mark, I've never read the Scott Pilgrim series (due to really hating the artwork, which, seeing as it's a visual medium is a biggie) but have always heard good things from friends and various internet based dwellings of the friendless virgins we call 'geeks'. The strength of this film, however, has made me reconsider my stance on all things Pilgrim, and will probably be dabbled with alongside the Walking Dead and my ongoing catching up of Transmetropolitan.

Being tipped out of a wheelchair hurts, especially if not 20 minutes earlier you were punched in the testicles.

I really wish I spent my childhood learning kung-fu instead of doing nothing all day except playing with Star Wars toys and watching the Simpsons. Actually wait, scratch that, I wish it was socially acceptable for me as a 22 year old man to do nothing all day but play with Star Wars toys and watch the Simpsons.

Viva la fucking France

Stüssy

Stüssy are going collaboration crazy this season as they continue to celebrate 30 years of hype glory, with the second Bape x Stüssy dropping in Bape London today and the upcoming Nike x Stüssy range hitting the Hideout next month. Want to see what's coming? Of course you do!

Bape x Stüssy: 'Survival of the Fittest'

The first part of this collab hit in late June and featured but a few limited edition tees. Part two promises to be much more imaginative, with tees, caps, hoods, shoes, coats and accessories scheduled to be released, as well as exclusive Bape x Stüssy shopping bags, also in limited supply.

Sorry for the piss-poor image quality...

Bape x Stüssy Limited Bag: Don't ask how I got hold of one. I won't tell.

So what are you doing reading this? This shit is a guaranteed sell-out, so if you're in London I urge you to go today and land some sweet threads! If not, get down to Bape in roughly two weeks time for drop number two!

For more on the collab, check out this interview with Bape's Nigo and Stüssy's Paul Mittleman form Honeyee.com.

Nike x Stüssy: 'All Court Mid'

Also released as part of Stüssy's 30th celebrations are the upcoming Nike All Courts. Scheduled to be available in both mysto blue and black, these are probably going to sell-out before they're even released. Hideout in London are the sole stockists of these in the UK, although exact prices and release dates are yet to be finalised. Go to Hideout's website and Paul Mittleman's blog for more details.

Life Jim, but Not as We Know It

So it may not involve being paid to wear outstanding Reeboks, be transcribing the finest details of Snoop Dogg's latest wild party or write about African land snails, but I have myself a job. I'm currently working in Graham (plumber's merchant) in Shepherd's Bush and its surprisingly really really fun. I'm only two weeks into it but already I have witnessed prank calls, a klaxon attack, a sausage being slapped across a room and more homosexual innuendo then you'd care to shake a stick at. Boss. At the end of the day though it's money in the bank and I've had my eye on a fair few items as of late...

University of Michigan Letterman jacket

Currently available in Urban Outfitters for a cool £120, this will be mine and finally fill the varsity shaped hole in my wardrobe.

I must be totally honest with you though, there is one predominant reason why I want this jacket, it's not to make the missus jealous, or because I'd look like the High-School football captain (I will tackle everyone whilst wearing this jacket though). No, the reason I want this jacket, is so I can finally be one of the Steiner Brothers. Incredible.

Nike SB P.Rod

I've really been hankering for some stripped back SBs as of late, I originally had my eye on the Koston's, but unfortunately, as is the way with all sought-after sneakers, they're all but sold, except for sizes 5-7. Who are these tiny footed bastards and why aren't they buying these shoes? Duck sauce. Anyway, my next alternative is the Paul Rodriguez pro model, currently available from Slam City for a smashing £54.95.

A Bathing APE ASNKA Crewneck

I have never had a harder time finding an item of clothing as I have when looking for a simple grey sweater  with a nice front-print. It has been stupidly hard, like trying to cut an apple in half in mid air with a katana and no formal bushido training. BLHB favourites BAPE have this available on their EU website currently for £160, with a Champion collab available online soon. Again, I am going to hunt this down like a man possessed and wear it like it were a second skin.

This weekend in Shoreditch (12th-14th of November) you can find a Gimme Five endorsed sample sale. Entry is one English pound and features items from Stüssy, GoodEnoughUK and Billionaire Boys Club amongst others. Friday was Stüssy exclusive, and I managed to pick up one of last year's Xaime Hernandez tees (but in white) for £15. Sunday is throwing up a sale from London hotspot the Hideout which should unearth some absolutely choice cuts.

MOTIFS OF THE WEEK

• Scarves with everything
• Getting angry at Radio One
• Watching the original extended cut of Clerks on repeat with the commentary track
• Drinking hot chocolate and being called a Teddy Boy
• Singing LFC chants at any possible moment
• Listening to copious amounts of Fugazi
• Listening to Between the Buried and Me's cover of 'Territory' by Sepultura and thinking it would be ideal entrance music if I ever became a professional wrestler

See? I'd totally win championships to that music.

Dispatches from the Capital #1

29/08/2010 

It’s been four days since I moved down to foggy old London town, where the streets are paved with gold/phlegm. As of yet I’ve not explored much of my new city, save for a jaunt to Ikea and a few trips to ASDA. Now I know this sounds terribly tragic and thoroughly middle aged and anyone reading this must be thoroughly disappointed at my lack of heroin abuse, supermodel shagging and generic NME coverage, however it’s a period of adjustment so accept it or I’ll smash you in with some wood... 

...not that I’m going to abuse heroin, I’m fine with tea thankyouverymuch. 

The hat in question, only mine is charcoal
(least interesting caption ever)

My first foray into greater London (not ever, I’m not a fucking tourist) came courtesy of a half-arsed stroll into Shoreditch in the search of somewhere to watch the mighty Liverpool take on West Brom (I’m still trying to convince the world that I am a man dammit). We soon found out that Shoreditch is too trendy to show footie, well aside from one pub that was showing Everton vs. Aston Villa – fuck that. I’m actually still surprised that they showed any football at all, the best I was expecting would be something ‘quirky’ like a Wimbledon 1985 season review or Icelandic, blind beach football, but hey everyone just wanted to hang out, drink coffees and revel in their own beauty. Little did we know (being new to the area) that Sunday was market day on Brick Lane with a variety of little stalls selling everything from vintage smoking jackets and KISS tees, to Lego jewellery and meatballs, as well as booming business in the local Rough Trade record shop. I came this close *pinches fingers to symbolise distance* to buying some old hardcore punk fanzines and a couple of Converge records, but the ever present icy stare of my bank balance burned into my back like a hot skillet. 

I managed to also uncover a sample sale of OBEY clothing on the edge of the market, a three-day smash-and-grab kinda job offering new season clothing at massively reduced prices. I gave in to my new found pretentiousness and splurged on a pork-pie hat for only £20. Apparently I wear it well, but I can't help but feel a little like Gadget from This is England...

06/09/2010

I have been here for nearly two weeks now, and I remain jobless. Granted, my search has been, well, kinda half-arsed so far as I’ve achieved little more than sprinkling a few CVs around (of course they were to good places though; BAPE, The Hideout, Eastpak etc. – outlook on myself landing ANY of these is very slim indeed) and I am in the midst of filling out an application form for Foot Locker. You may be thinking “Stop blogging to no-one and finish that form you overweight idiot” and you’d have a point, but it is such a banal piece of literature that I’m having trouble convincing my own being to not stab myself in the throat.

EXAMPLE; “Tell us about a time when you provided extraordinary customer service by delivering the unexpected.”

If this form wasn’t so important, and, to a lesser extent, if I didn’t actually want to work for Foot Locker (it’s just a ‘for now’ thing, not a lifetime career) then I would crumple it into a tiny ball, insert it directly into my anus, light the protruding tip on fire then spend the following 45 minutes smashing my head into my desk.

Away from the job search, London continues to treat me fairly well. I’ve yet to be harassed, stabbed, mugged, threatened, raped or even looked at with shifty intent. My female-friend popped up for a few days (check her blog - wintagenetvoodle.blogspot.com) and made me feel loved and relaxed. Again, we checked out the Brick Lane market as it was one of the bargaining tools I used in coaxing her down for four days. Needless to say she loved it, and I managed to pick up a vintage Stüssy cap for a tenner off of a bloke in the street. It’s my kind of area – busy, yet somehow cut-off. Friendly, yet not ‘in-your-face’. Quirky, yet not annoying. Once I get the ball rolling career-wise, I could definitely see myself living there.

However the pangs of no fixed income snapped at my heels for the entirety of her stay. A trip to Size? unearthed a varsity jacket for £50 that would usually be eaten up like yesterday’s curry, but was instead left to hang like a high-five from a knobhead, and my search for a denim shirt (never thought I’d find myself searching for a denim shirt) only produced depressing examples of how urgently I need employment. I may have to swallow my pride and go with anything. I may go all Midnight Cowboy on yo’ asses and attempt to pimp myself out to wealthy 40+ women, befriending a diseased Dustin Hoffman in the process and eventually immigrating to Florida...

...now I come to think of it, that’s not such a bad idea after all.