Smorgasbord

Right, we all know I'm a crap blogger alright? It's not my fault that all my free time is spent fighting crime, sleeping and somehow getting chocolate on my neck, because with great power, comes great responsibility....

...so yeah, how are you and stuff? Really? Neat. Let's get down to the nitty-gritty; me what has been bought by the Hooligan for the last few months, neck chocolate aside that is.

TEES.

Above: 1 Seal tee, £15 - Lazy Oaf sale (January)

Below: 2 Popeye tee, Supreme, £35 - Dover Street Market (December)

Oh right, what a boob I am, turns out i don't have any photos of me in the other tees I blagged, and trust me there're some fucking beauts in there. But don't fret, I have a camera, and at least one friend with opposable thumbs so they'll be up soon. DON'T CRY BIRD.

So yeah, moving on...

1 How much of a beast is this please? Always got to show some love for Lazy Oaf, amazing designs on display on everything from tees to packing tape. This one was a no-brainer for me, let's run through the checklist;

* White tee? CHECK

* Fresh colouring? CHECK

* Ecstatic seal with tiny hands? CHECK

2 I don't need to tell you how hard Supreme is to get hold of. Seriously, it's a fucking joke at times, but then I'd rather it be that way than the average pleb bombing round town in a Supreme tee to match their G-Star Raw/Hollister combinations. Twats. But yeah, sourced this out way before release as I just full-on love everything about it, I mean come on, who doesn't love Popeye? The old drunk. It'll look even better when I lose my Christmas boobs though (yep, still here, damn neck chocolate...)

KICKS.

Above: 3 BAPE Roadsta88, £165 £99 - A Bathing Ape Pirate Store, London (January)

Below: 4 Nike + Stüssy, All-Court Black, £70 - The Hideout (December)

            5 Nike + Stüssy, All-Court White, £70 - The Hideout (December)

Above: 6 Nike AirMax Light, £90 - Foot Patrol (December

Below: 7 Nike AirMax 90 Infra-Red, £90 - Kixclusive (January)

The coming months are very strong in terms of sneaker releases, from the Nike Dunk Liberty and ?uestlove, to the upcoming new season in the Adidas/Star Wars range. However, before I get carried away I need to remember that I only have two feet and have to save up to go see Voodle in New York this summer (where I WILL finally snag the elusive Ueno Panda...)

3 BAPE opened up their first UK Pirate Store in Shoreditch from January 22-30th and offered rarities, factory seconds and limited quantities of fresh items at discounted prices. Naturally I was there on the sunday, met with a medium sized, but healthy queue outside the main doors, flanked by three huge guards decked in the finest Ape-wear. Inside was more of the same, with racks upon racks of goods surrounded by hype-bastards, clueless turds and general riff-raff. I copped a pair of red/gold Apesta88 (basically the Air Jordan 3 but for twice the price) discounted from £165 to £99. It was a no-brainer.

4 & 5 I previewed the Nike + Stüssy All-Courts back in October and impatiently awaited the drop. Learning my mistakes after the Nike Supreme 94 debacle I was all over tis release like a tramp on discarded chips. This time when I rang the Hideout, after exchanging pleasantries, I was hit with the million dollar question;

"Do you want to reserve a pair in white, in black, or do you want both?"

I shook, softly at first, but with each tremor my movement became more violent. Weighing up the pros and cons in my mind (Cons: Would barely afford to live for a month, christmas would be a struggle. Pros: I'd look hella bad-ass) I took the plunge and opted for both. Lucky I did though, as they sold out in a day, and considering that the Hideout was the only stockist of the kicks in the UK I was a very lucky boy indeed. I'll say this though, I didn't eat properly for the following weeks, but by God are my shoes beautiful.

6 Following on from my first AirMax gamble in August, I felt the time was right to get more. Well, that's a lie, I just happened to be in Foot Patrol with a fresh paycheck burning a hole in my pocket and had to buy them, mainly to fill the Infra-Red sized hole in my life...

7 ...which I plugged not long after. I wanted the Infra-Reds upon release back in August, but couldn't afford them due to moving down south, so when I finally got some pennies rolling I hunted the internet for a pair. As usual though, the only sizes available were in the region of size 5 (buy nice shoes you tiny footed pricks or I'll cut off your limbs). Luckily, New York dealer Kixclusive got some in to their web store, and the price, including postage, worked out roughly the same. Like all AirMax they're very comfy and seem to go with anything, despite the unorthodox colouring. Emma can't stand them though, but screw it, they're comfy and swish, and came in a stupidly fast amount of time.

So yeah, that's what I've been up-to for the last few months, aside from lucha-libre, Fanric, tee jaunts and music video making, but they're stories for another time....

...oh go on then. Here's a music video I made with my boys at Fungunt Productions for the Eurythmics' synth classic 'There Must Be An Angel (Playing With My Heart)'. Enjoy, and if you genuinely DO enjoy, then please let me, or the boys know through the above links *looks up two lines*

Tales of Interest!

Things have gotten a little slack here on BLHB, and I for one am not happy about it. Sure I can blame work, or the fact that all my free time has been spent either religously playing the latest Smackdown game or in the bank exasperated, but those would be the actions of a coward. Lucky then that I am a coward, so the answer is simple;

"My dog ate my computer."

* Recent Purchases

Money has started to flow into my bank account now so some inspired fashion purchases have been made, from the recent Nike Stüssy's (sold out in less than a day, I picked up two pairs), Nike Infra-reds and a pair of AirMax Lights, to one of Supreme's amazing Popeye tees, courtesy of DSM, bypassing a long awaited ensnaring of a 'look at me I go fox hunting/killing plebs for a gangster' Barbour jacket. It's safe to say then that I am loving my wardrobe at the moment as my collection of all things rare and exclusive is starting to blossom in this city that we call London.

*Noddy Holder-fest

Of course you don't need me to tell you that it's been Christmas recently, you've been constantly reminded by shops, television, radio and state sponsored propaganda films since mid June. This Christmas was a strange one for me peronally, as it was the first time I've been away form home in the build-up to the festive period and as such I was feeling a tad glum and bored. In true Steve Martin style though, I got home on Christmas eve (via train, not plane nor automobile unfortunately) and bounded straight to the pub dressed as a future sex offender to be greeted heroically and groped by a myriad of friends and relatives that I have not seen in months. Christmas itself, as ever, came and went extremely quickly and before I knew it I was back on my way to London bashing out my thoughts on my netbook. Ah well. The missus was up for a few days for the New year/January sales and my boys were up at the end of January for an ill-advised Fabric and shopping jaunt. As expected, several bass related injuries occurred.

*Odds and Sods

I'm obsessed with Nicolas Cage. I never thought it would happen seeing as I hated him as a child (despite never have seeing any of his movies until my teenage years). This recent worship was brought on by the incredible YouTube video of him losing his shit, which led to me shouting "VIVA LA FUCKING FRANCE MAN" at any opportunity, whether warranted or not.

Finally saw Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World and it is truly an awesome film. Combining the visceral talents of Edgar Wright, the subtle comic turnings of Michael Cera and enough American garage rock and dorky references to keep overweight fanboys like myself salivating, this film rocked my socks. Whilst being a comics mark, I've never read the Scott Pilgrim series (due to really hating the artwork, which, seeing as it's a visual medium is a biggie) but have always heard good things from friends and various internet based dwellings of the friendless virgins we call 'geeks'. The strength of this film, however, has made me reconsider my stance on all things Pilgrim, and will probably be dabbled with alongside the Walking Dead and my ongoing catching up of Transmetropolitan.

Being tipped out of a wheelchair hurts, especially if not 20 minutes earlier you were punched in the testicles.

I really wish I spent my childhood learning kung-fu instead of doing nothing all day except playing with Star Wars toys and watching the Simpsons. Actually wait, scratch that, I wish it was socially acceptable for me as a 22 year old man to do nothing all day but play with Star Wars toys and watch the Simpsons.

Viva la fucking France

Stüssy

Stüssy are going collaboration crazy this season as they continue to celebrate 30 years of hype glory, with the second Bape x Stüssy dropping in Bape London today and the upcoming Nike x Stüssy range hitting the Hideout next month. Want to see what's coming? Of course you do!

Bape x Stüssy: 'Survival of the Fittest'

The first part of this collab hit in late June and featured but a few limited edition tees. Part two promises to be much more imaginative, with tees, caps, hoods, shoes, coats and accessories scheduled to be released, as well as exclusive Bape x Stüssy shopping bags, also in limited supply.

Sorry for the piss-poor image quality...

Bape x Stüssy Limited Bag: Don't ask how I got hold of one. I won't tell.

So what are you doing reading this? This shit is a guaranteed sell-out, so if you're in London I urge you to go today and land some sweet threads! If not, get down to Bape in roughly two weeks time for drop number two!

For more on the collab, check out this interview with Bape's Nigo and Stüssy's Paul Mittleman form Honeyee.com.

Nike x Stüssy: 'All Court Mid'

Also released as part of Stüssy's 30th celebrations are the upcoming Nike All Courts. Scheduled to be available in both mysto blue and black, these are probably going to sell-out before they're even released. Hideout in London are the sole stockists of these in the UK, although exact prices and release dates are yet to be finalised. Go to Hideout's website and Paul Mittleman's blog for more details.

Get Real Paid

Finally FINALLY got some money in the bank since moving down to the capital, and by golly what a sweet feeling it is. Now I know that Christmas is fast approaching like a greased up sex-pest, but I needed some highly selfish 'ME' purchases...

...so I ended up in Bape.

Top 4 Images: Bape x Champion Crew Sweater. £190

Bottom 2 Images: Bape Large Head Belt. £195

I think I may have gone slightly overboard. However, in my defence against a flabbergasted Emma, I asked how much she had spent on clothes in the last 3 months and compared it to how much I had spent. It pretty much evened out. Buoyed by my successful wrangling, I have applied to do law at Yale (I haven't).

What are your thoughts on these purchases? Leave 'em in the comments box.

10 is the Magic Number

So there was I, doing my usual computer-based routine of blogging, torturing myself via the Billionaire Boys Club website and listening to Mark Kermode rant about Michael Bay when I saw that I'd been challenged to name the '10 Things that I Love' by the ever incredible Voodle. Not one to shy away from a challenge, I gave it a long hard think (I didn't, it came to me like a flash) and came up with my definitive top ten.

Things that remind me of my childhood

Including, but not limited to; Bill and Ted, Wayne's World, shouting "TURTLE POWER"

Dressing like a Super-hero, Terminator 2, Super Street Fighter II Turbo, WWF, Nintendo

Private Jokes

There is nothing greater than the bemusement of others,

especially if humour is the underlying cause.

Knowing that someone is on their way to see me

London is a lonely place when your entire life has been spent dicking around

with your friends in a little town by the sea. Knowing that someone is ready willing

and able to come keep me company for a few days makes me forget all that.

The pursuit of knowledge

"All men by nature desire knowledge." - Aristotle

Staying in bed watching cartoons

Come on, who doesn't love cartoons? A shameless smorgasbord of sex,

violence, death and more bright colours than you could shake a stick at.

Songs that amaze you no matter how

many times you've heard them

Music can not be explained. People can detail the technical elements 'til

they're blue in the face, but no-one can really know why a song is amazing.

Convincing the World that I am a style icon

People are sheep, everyone knows that. No matter how much we go against 

the grain, we are still being shepherded somehow and in someway. So people

should copy me, and look like a massive joke.

(I would NEVER leave the house looking like that by the way)

Star Wars

Fuck every other film ever made, they are all now irrelevant.

Clothing

It may not look like much now, but what you see before you

are the foundations of a Dynasty.

Home

SB = Swish Bastard

Yes. It's true. I now own some Nike x Supreme SBs. I am fucking buzzing.

Whilst the more seasoned and cynical followers of hype fashion may sneer at the Nike Supreme 94s I could not give two hoots. What this (worryingly) proves to me is how much I value my wardrobe as not only was I frantically calling into every sneak-boutique as soon as these were announced trying to find a supplier and a due date, but I had the numbers of said stores on speed-dial, calling in the middle of the night all forlorn and breathless like a sex offender. But, as is the case with Murphy's Law, I was almost right royally shafted. Now I have a job (but seeing as it started so late in the year) I was entitled to book one day off before December 31st, so I did and on the 18th of November I went home to Wallasey in order to spend a quiet weekend celebrating my 22nd with my family and my better half. Little did I know that on this average weekend not only would these sneakers drop, but there'd be no chance of reserving a pair. Oh and my future wife Dita Von Teese was performing in London.

I take it you now understand my sheer horror.

Fast forward to monday and my lunch-break in work. The phone comes out. The Hideout are called;

Hideout: "Good afternoon, Hideout."

Me: "Alright mate, what's the stock like on the Nike Supreme SBs in a UK size 10?"

Hideout: "Sorry mate, sold out."

Me: "Duck sauce."

Phone hangs up. A look of abject terror grips my face. Dover Street Market are called;

DSM: "Good afternoon, Dover Street Market."

Me: "What's the stock like on the Nike Supreme SBs in a UK size 10? FOR GOD'S SAKE MAN TELL ME."

DSM: "We have one pair left and they're in blue."

Me: "Please please PLEASE can you reserve them until after 5 tonight? I NEED these shoes!"

DSM: "Sure thing, see you later!"

Phone hangs up. My face calms down. My hands stop trembling.

Anywho, long story short, I got to DSM in record time from Shepherd's Bush, bought the bastards and danced home like little ol' Charlie Bucket.

Testin' like a Western

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